GM.

It’s Arsen, bringing you the 9th edition of TLDR - the newsletter that keeps you informed AND entertained.

First, happy Sunday to 1,201 of you reading today.

Every week I sit down and try to write my best newsletter yet.

Maybe today I did it. Maybe not. You be the judge.

Alright, let’s get into it.

Here’s what I got for you:

• Balaji’s $1 million bitcoin bet: possibility or delusion?

• The Feds are coming for your bitcoin

• Do Kwon arrested with fake documents

Estimated read time: 4 minutes and 53 seconds

BREAKDOWN: $1 MILLION BITCOIN BET

If you hang out on Bitcoin Twitter as I do (of course you do), you’ve probably heard about Balaji’s $1 million Bitcoin in 90 days (82 now) bet.

“What’s a balaji?”

Balaji Srinivasan is the guy who predicted stuff like:

• How covid lockdown would plan out and affect the economy

• How the separation of real and digital identities (pseudonyms) would become a huge thing

He also has a bunch of 9-figure startup exits and was the CTO of Coinbase for a while.

So yeah, when Balaji makes a prediction, everybody and their dog listens.

When he predicted Bitcoin to reach $1 million per coin (no biggie, just a 40x increase), Twitter exploded. As expected.

Here’s why Balaji is confident in his bet:

1. Some banks have collapsed (Silvergate, SVB, Signature). Others are on the verge.

2. Governments worldwide will be forced to print trillions of $$$ to save the banks.

3. This new money will lead to hyperinflation. And in the age of social media, this will happen even faster.

4. Bitcoin will be seen as a hedge against inflation hyperinflation. People will flock to the asset and pump its price.

It’s safe to say that nobody believes this prediction. Saifedean explained why $1 million Bitcoin in 82 days is unlikely. I agree with him.

There’s a better chance that somebody from the XRP Army gets a girlfriend than Bitcoin reaching $1 million in 3 months.

So why are we talking about it?

Well, as dumb as the prediction is, it serves on purpose: create a hyper-viral meme to get millions of people talking about:

• The banking crisis

• Out-of-control hyperinflation

• Governments going after crypto onramps (operation chokepoint 2.0. more on this later)

• …and how bitcoin fixes all of this

And now, the cat is out of the bag: banks are insolvent and on the verge of collapse. More and more people are waking up to this.

And central banks being central banks, they tried to hide this with various accounting tricks. It's like that one time in middle school when you “silent farted.”

The school was never the same after that…

And what does bitcoin think about all this? It’s up over 45% since the crisis began.

Bitcoin was meant for moments like these.

H/t @TheBTCTherapist for the meme

THE FEDS ARE CRACKING DOWN ON BITCOIN

The regulatory crackdown on bitcoin is here. And we’re calling it operation chokepoint 2.0.

“What happened to 1.0?”

Well, let me tell you. The first happened in 2013 when the U.S. DOJ started going after banks dealing with “high-risk” clients, such as firearms dealers, payday lenders, and online casinos.

Essentially, the government weaponized banks to cut off businesses they didn’t like from the financial system.

And today, operation chokepoint 2.0 has a new target: bitcoin.

The first signs appeared weeks ago but were brushed off ass conspiracy talk (because who doesn’t like a good conspiracy?).

Then all of this happened in the span of 2 weeks:

• Coinbase got a Wells notice

• CashApp is framed as being the most used app by criminals

• Kraken no longer accepts ACH deposits and withdrawals

• Justin Sun got sued this week by the SEC for selling unregistered securities, fraud, and market manipulation

• A bunch of YouTubers got sued for promoting FTX

• France plans to ban influencers from promoting crypto products

• Various banks limiting their users’ bitcoin purchases

Smells fishy…

But it gets more sus. Here’s why:

1. Signature, a crypto-friendly bank, got shut down by the U.S. government.

2. The Feds initially said the bank’s closure had nothing to do with crypto.

3. Later a report came out that FDIC will force the buyer to shut down Signature’s crypto accounts.

4. Finally, Flagstar bank acquires all of Signature’s assets. All except its digital assets.

*fishy smell intensifies*

As a cherry on top, a guy who sat on the Signature Board and a self-described crypto skeptic said the shutdown was only to “send a strong anti-crypto message.”

There was no insolvency at Signature. The Feds just wanted to send a warning to other banks thinking about getting into crypto.

*chokes*

Alright, let’s take a glass of water and take a well-rounded look at the situation:

Don’t worry, anon. Bitcoin will survive.

Of course, bitcoin services being cut off from banking is not good, but bitcoin was designed to work as an independent and self-sustaining circular system.

And people are starting to realize bitcoin's value proposition: money without central chokepoints.

At the end of the day, bitcoin is just code - anyone can run it.

Do you think there’s a crackdown on bitcoin? Let me know in the comments.

Sorry to interrupt your reading. I have something you don’t want to miss.

I've written ‘Bitcoin as Money’ research paper for my university. I’ve only shared it with my professor and kept it private until now.

Share TLDR with 1 person, and I will send you the research paper.

DO KWON ARRESTED IN MONTENEGRO

It’s official: Do Kwon has been finally arrested. The chase is over.

Known has been on a hide-and-seek streak for 320 days now. It’s game over for him now.

Kwon was found in Montenegro, trying to leave the country with fake documents.

And for the people that think an oval ball (🏈) you mostly play with your hand is football, Montenegro is a small country in the Balkans.

Just kidding. I love my freedom-loving brethren across the pond. 🇺🇸

Not kidding about the football part, though.

Anyway, the Montenegro police detained a person who appeared to be Kwon based on age, name, and nationality. This was left out of reports, but he also rocked his signature shit-eating grin.

Here’s the ID that was found on Kwon:

According to the report, he carried fake passports from Costa Rica and Belgium, 5 phones, and 3 laptops.

And unless that’s Kwon’s long-lost brother Ko Dwon, the authorities caught the right man.

In case you haven’t been following the drama, here’s Kwon’s most recent résumé:

• Caused the collapse of the $40 billion Luna ecosystem ecosystem

• Accused of fraud and various financial crimes

• Been on the run for 320+ days

• Wanted by the SEC, DOJ, and Interpol. I wish girls chased me like the authorities chase Kwon

So, now what? Kwon has been charged in multiple countries, including Singapore, South Korea, and the U.S. They all want a piece of him.And even though Kwon is a celebrity, I doubt he will be doing a prison tour to kiss some hands and shake some babies. He will most likely be extradited to the U.S.

I’m already excited about the court case. It should be good. 🍿

Rabbit Hole Reads

• Nature is healing. Over 70,000 BTC has been moved to self-custody wallets since SVB collapsed

• The White House doesn’t like the orange coin. The White House publishes an economic report on bitcoin. Spoiler alert: it’s bad

• Goldman Sachs has highlighted Bitcoin as the best-performing asset of 2023

This week in a meme

H/t @TheBTCTherapist for the meme

Job of the week

yo.

Our boy Jack over at Strike is looking for a Director of Customer Service.

Now Imagine those 1-on-1 sessions with Jack…bullishness overload. You want this job. Don’t lie to me.

From the archive

14 years ago, Satoshi wrote these famous words.

Today they’re as relevant as ever.

Shoutouts

Shoutout to my colleague Anna who helped me create a new logo for TLDR Bitcoin.

She is a graphic designer and a bitcoiner. So if you need any help with graphic design, you can reach out here.

That’s it for this one.

If you like what you read, please do “add to address book” or reply to this to this email (it helps with email deliverability). If you don’t, you can unsubscribe below.

See you next Sunday,

Arsen

PS: My content is NOT free. If you read more than one edition of TLDR, you’ve signed a Gentleman’s agreement. Here’s what you have to do to honor it:

Share TLDR with 1 bitcoiner

It’s called the gentleman agreement because it’s an honor code, and I trust you to do it.